Monogamy is Arbitrary

Beware, the following statement I am about to make is highly controversial, mildly disturbing, morally challenging, and excruciatingly hungry.

(no really! this is not a suspense-building device. I promise!)

I’ve been working on this theory for so long, but I’ve only worked the whole thing out recently.

You read it here first!

I have only shared a preliminary version of it with a very special friend of mine (=P no ill intentions!), and it has otherwise never seen the light.

dadada =D



There is nothing wrong with polygamy.

Sure, if you get multiple wives/husbands in any “civilized” jurisdiction, you will likely be thrown into jail, and be fed 5 uncooked rats a day.

But if you actually think about it, what’s wrong with polygamy?

The underlying premise of marriage, or any other similar kinds of civil union, is love.

Is there something wrong with loving more than one person at once?

What is love? A feeling of passion, affection, and attachment. May or may not be reciprocated. It’s a stronger version of “like”, which, IMHO, although not shared by most people, is no more than a stronger version of “friend”. We care about friends, we feel attached to them, and we feel happy being around them. There’s nothing fundamentally different between friends and lovers. With one exception.


By modern social conventions, friends shouldn’t have sex (don’t shoot the messenger…).

If our law allows one to have multiple friends, but only one “partner”, it has to be something to do with sex. What about sex? Why can’t we have babies with everyone on the streets if we so choose?

Gender equality? Bullshit. Girls can have multiple husbands, too.

That is the question.

And here is my answer –

The only plausible explanation I can think of is to ensure the survival of the human species.

You read that right =P. Our law tries to prevent humans from going extinct.

How does that work? If all humans are allowed to mate with any number of other humans, by the 80/20 rule, 80% of guys will be attached to the most attractive (by some definition) 20% of girls, and vice versa.

But for the purpose of pumping out babies as fast as possible, this is far from optimal. Both girls and guys (more so for girls) have a limited reproduction rate. We simply can’t pump out a baby every minute.

By intuition, it’s easy to see that the optimal solution is when every guys is matched with only unique girl, and vice versa.

We have a law to ensure that 🙂 – the survival of homo sapiens.

Any alternative explanations?

7 thoughts on “Monogamy is Arbitrary”

  1. Because one wife with many husbands is never going to happen in Western society (it implies female-dominance). We’re not even yet at a stage where there’s gender equality, so matriarchy is not going to happen any time soon.

  2. I kinda think marriage is geared towards children, and not the couple (as much). It seems that children with one parent or step-parents aren’t experiencing the childhood they deserve (eg. learn to be good citizen) (I may be wrong here, but I do know a few ppl). I can extrapolate that to polygamous parents.

    1. haha yeah that makes sense.

      children of 1:n polygamous parents will only get equivalent of 1+1/n parents.

  3. what a pimpster 😉
    haha jkjk.

    this raises some interesting questions. i think it’s primarily because humans don’t like to share. once you share your love, it’s not as profound as committing the whole of your life to one person.

    and if it’s really allowed, we’ll have chaos. our society will break down because of all that complicated mathematical stuff alone.

    1. oh yeah that makes sense.

      we want the other person to feel special, which, by definition, means 1 =D (by my definition anyways =)).

    2. oh hey and thanks for the great suggestion!

      now I know what to do if I can’t find a job =D=D

      i’m a natural! and I don’t even need to cross the moral barrier, because i think it’s fundamentally right!! =D

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